How I Lose 10 Bucks Every March…

18 03 2009

Here is my official bracket for this years NCAA Tournament. If I had the money, I’d be wasting it again in a pool with a bunch of friends. However, since I have no job (no office pool) and I have no money, I am basically taking my skills to the internet.

Of course, since nothing is really on the line, this is the year I will win.

And here ya go!

bracket-picks1

Now, I like to enjoy a little fun here and there, so in keeping with tradition I started years ago I have created the “I Like” Bracket picks. These picks are based on me liking things. For example, I may like a team based on my childhood fandom. Or I knew a good friend who went to that school. I may be a diehard fan of that school. Or the girls are rumored to be really hot there. This is how I pick my “I Like” Bracket. It would be much like a girl picking based on mascot, or colors.

side note. This WILL NOT win me anything. But Its fun.
Here it is.
i-like-bracket

Let me break down this for ya…
MIDWEST
Morehead St over Louisville – for obvious reasons. What guy doesn’t like Morehead?? (ps, I’m the same dude in college who bought a S.Carolina Camecocks hat, because it said COCKS on it. I thought that was funny.)

Ohio St. over Siena – just because

Arizona over Utah – I’ve lived in Utah, and not a fan. Plus gotta stay true to my Mormon heritage, and root for BYU. Oh, and Arizona has hotter girls.

Wake over Cleveland St – just because

West Virginia over Dayton – just because

North Dakota St. over Kansas – Cause I hate Kansas.

USC over BC – I love Boston, but USC got a small place in my heart. They filmed Buffy there.

Michigan State over Robert Morris – just because.

ROUND 2.
Morehead over Ohio State – can’t help but giggle.

Zona over Wake – Hot girls.

West Virgina over N.Dakota St. – The mountaineers of this great country all but eliminated Bison from the map. Therefore, WVU.

USC over Michigan State – Battle of the Trojans. (innuendo implied)

Round 3
Morehead over Zona – obviously.

USC over West VirginiaSong girls get me every time.

Midwest ChampMorehead over USC.
Buffy, Song Girls, and other UBER hotness cant compete with Morehead. (not going to lie, that one made me chuckle a bit.)

WEST
UCONN over Chattanooga – this was close, cuase it’s fun to say Cattanooooooga!

BYU over Texas A&M – Mormon roots.

Purdue over N. Iowa – Nothing good came from Iowa except Field of Dreams

Miss. St. over WashingtonTed Bundy was a Huskie. I hate UW. Plus Miss St. are the Bulldogs.

Utah St. over Marqutte – I had an ex girlfriend that went to Utah St. She was a nice girl.

Cornell over Missouri – I just think of Andy from The Office when I think of Cornell now. That’s funny.

Cal over Maryland – I made out with this girl that wen to Maryland once. She was a raging bitch.

Memphis over Cal. St. Northridge – I remember one of the guys from Coach Carter went to Cal. St. Northridge. Wasn’t Ashanti in that? That can’t be very good for your program!

ROUND 2
UCONN over BYU – My Mormon roots only go so far.

Miss State over Purdue – Bulldog thing again.

Cornell over Utah St. – Andy from the Office. (it’s a different one!)

Memphis over Cal – just because.

ROUND 3
UCONN over Miss State – I think this is because my good friend attened UCONN and we have since watched many a UCONN game at Buffalo Wild Wings ( a favorite of mine.)

Cornell over Memphis – Man, this whole Andy thing is giving them quite the run.

WEST CHAMP
UCONN over Cornell – Andy is no match for Wild Wings and Beer. Oh and friends. Not the show, actual people in my life.

EAST
Pitt over East Tennesee – just because

Tennessee over Oklahoma St. – My dad was born in Tennessee

Wisconsin over Florida St. – I hate florida State, and Badgers are badass!

Portland St. over Xavier – no brainer.

UCLA over VCU – Commonwealth just sounds so weak. Like man up and become more. Geez.

American over Villanova – uhhh… I’m American. America, Fuck Ya!

Minnesota over Texas – While Texas has some hot girls, I hate UT with a passion.

Duke over Binghamton – just cause.

ROUND 2
Pitt over Tennessee – the Dad thing only gets you so far.

Portland State over Wisc – Badgers are no match for Vikings.

American over UCLA – There would be no UCLA without America!

DUKE over Minn – Cause I like Duke.

ROUND 3
Portland St over Pitt – Portland is Awesome.

American over Duke“I’m Proud to be an American..”

EAST CHAMPION
Portland St. over American – National Pride only goes so far people. Till it gets obnoxious and gives more reason for the French to hate us.

SOUTH
UNC over Radford – I almost picked Radford so I could use RAD the rest of the way…

Butler over LSU – Bulldogs. Plus purple is for the French

Illinois over Western KentuckyWKU’s mascot freaks me out a bit.

Gonzaga over Akron – Zags have been my team for years now. I’ve been let down many times before, and fear it’ll happen again! But not in the I Like Bracket.

Arizona St over TempleThe Cosby Factor helped Temple, but as we all know, hot girls trump the Cos.

Stephen F. Austin over Syracuse – This is AWESOME! Stone Cold Stephen F. Austin, gives Syracuse the Stone Cold Stunner!

Michigan over Clemson – been a fan of Michigan since I was little… got a Starter jacket to prove it.

Oklahoma over Morgan St. – just because.

ROUND 2
UNC over Butler – I like Carolina Blue.

Gonzaga over Illinois – Bulldogs again. And I hate Orange as a team color.

Arizona St. over STEVE AUSTIN – Steve Austin’s glory days in the WWE were glorious, (espcially when I saw him live in Houston TX at Wrestlemania.) However hot girls turned my head more then WWE. Arizona State takes this one.

Michigan over Oklahoma – I wish the Bball team would incorporate the “wings” like the football team does.

ROUND 3
Gonzaga over UNC – An ex-girlfriend of mine knew Matt Santangelo and others from the sweet 16 Zags team. She got me hooked. Which is cool, cause I got the team in the breakup. Go Zags

Arizona St. over MichiganHot girls go far in my bracket.

SOUTH CHAMP
Gonzaga over Arizona St. – What can I say, I like Bulldogs. And Hot chicks like Bulldogs.

FINAL FOUR
Morehead over UCONN – I like Beer and Wings quite a bit, but there is something I like more…

Gonzaga over Portland St. – Local pride only gets you so far. Go Zags!

CHAMPIONSHIP
Morehead over Gonzaga – Who didn’t see it coming?? I mean really? It’s hilarious. And yes, very immature. But hilarious.

Good luck to all!

Feel free to email…
SarcasmAsAWeapon@gmail.com

Until Next time…

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Gym Rat, March Madness, Job Hunting…

24 03 2008

So as it turns out, I’ve officially gone one full week with going to the gym. It’s pretty crazy I know. I never really thought I’d have it in me to do so, but low and behold I’m knocking out mile after mile. I surprise even myself sometimes.

Friday morning I found myself waking up just a little bit early to make sure I made it to the gym and downtown to watch some March Madness with my friends. First game on tap is Gonzaga, and of course I have them to win. Ever since I was back in college and the girl I was dating at the time was good friends with some of the players, I have been a fan. Of course it didn’t hurt that that was the first year they went really far in the tournament. The team of Matt Santangelo, Casey Calvary, etc etc…

Anyway, so I proceed to the gym knowing full well, that if I get my workout done I’ll be home by halftime, shower, then on the Buffalo Wild Wings. So I find a treadmill crank it up, and look above to find a television with the game on it. When low and behold I get nothing!!! Stupid Obama was in town talking about something and they didn’t have the game on! WTF??? Who does that? What political leader in their right mind would pre-empt March Madness? I mean, he filled out a bracket. Wasn’t he concerned of the outcome? Did this not affect the outcome of his office pool? Seriously. Frustrating.

Obama finished his speech and the game returned, and all was well with the world. Aside from the shooting pains in my calf muscle. I finished up my work out, got all dolled up, and went down to BW3. My timing in my head must have been off, because I ended up listening to Gonzaga lose at the buzzer on my car radio. How dissapointed was I. Not only did I miss the game, I had to listen to them lose and crush my bracket just a little bit more. Which ultimately brings me to my next point.

I hate March Madness.

Well I don’t hate it. I mean I do, I just, wish it didn’t leave me feeling so empty. I’m reminded of Matt Damon’s character Mike in Rounders. You know the scene in the beginning where Mike knows he’s won, he’s a sure bet, and Teddy KGB sucker punches him in the gut with pocket Aces?? That’s pretty much how I feel by Sunday afternoon. Sucker punched in the gut, cause I know some friend of mine’s girlfriend is the one cleaning up our Bracket competition. All because she thought “Davidson Red looks good on me.” Son of a bitch.

I’d go more into depth on the whole bracket situation, but I’m pretty much done. At this point my saving grace is UCLA, North Carolina, and Memphis. But with my luck, they’ll all lose. Needless to say I won’t be that interested in the “Madness” until the championship game.

I’ve still got a lot of time on my hands, becuase I’m still looking for a job. And you know what else I hate…. pretty sure you all saw it coming, that’s right looking for a job. I seriously hate it. It’s good to know that I’m trying to find a job during a period of really shitty economy. That’s awesome.

Seriously though. I think one of the things I hate the most is a cover letter. What is the REAL point of a cover letter. I mean I get it’s purpose, to lobby for a job, to make yourself look better. But in all reality it’s just 3 more paragraphs that are more than likely going to expose you for the faker you really are. Cause in all honestly how many of us bend what our “experience” is to “job requirements?” I know I do. And I guess I have to really. Telling people in the real world exactly what I did isn’t easy with a little one page resume. And trust me when I say having Music Director on your resume doesn’t actually lend itself to to many opportunities. So with that, I decided to write a cover letter informing potential employers just how freakin awesome I am. More than likely, this will not work.

Big news though. Red Sox (and all of baseball) opening day is Tuesday morning at 3 am. Diasuke Matsusaka starts things off against Rich Harden of the Oakland A’s. I’m really kind of nervous though this year. I know we have a great group of really talented players, but I’m pretty sure the kiss of death came when I logged onto ESPN.com this morning. There it was on the front page no less. Baseball experts have picked the Sox as the “favorite” to win this year.

Ugh.

If you’re a real Sox fan you’ll already know that this can’t really bode well for our team. We’ve seen stuff like this before. We’ve never wanted to be the favorite. We like surprising people with our hard work and heart (04). We like overcoming odds, we like fighting and clawing our way back for the win (07). Most of all We Sox always, ALWAYS, have trepidation in our heart, because we know in a single fleeting second we can see it all crumble before our eyes. I spent all of last year keeping my mouth shut when we were 14 games ahead in the AL east. I kept my mouth shut when we were down 3-1 in the ALCS. I kept my faith at an all time high at every one of those pivotal points and I was rewarded. Now, I feel as if the black curse of death has been placed on my beloved Sox. Apox on you ESPN! APOX ON YOU!!!!!!!

But, wether or not the Sox are in first or in last, I will always be a proud member of Red Sox Nation. Go Sox!

Lastly, in keeping with my love affair of movies, I got some really great ones from Netflix this week. Michael Clayton, No Country For Old Men, Cashback, and some others. I just want so say that No Country, and Michael Clayton were as good as the nominations that followed. They were awesome. No Country was an amazing thriller with unforgetable characters provided by the Coen Brothers who are fantastic! Michael Clayton had a stellar cast that brought this intense drama to life. I highly reccomend both movies! Cashback… eh. It was alright.