2010 In Review…

19 01 2011

So basically, it’s been way too long since i’ve written in this blog. Which depresses me a bit. To be honest, a bit of my creative juices were wasted on my crappy ass job. I wasn’t happy and with that said the blog took a huge hit. I just didn’t have the energy to write.

Which is insanely sad because there were some pretty sweet adventures. Like the time I spent some time in Manchester England and got to see Manchester United play. (Which was EPIC. Went with my dad and we got the Hospitality package, and let me tell you… AMAZING! So amazing. Bucket list crossed off.)

Quickly after that, I was able to jaunt on down to San Francisco to hang with my great friend JDub, who had recently gotten a job with a pretty sweet advertising agency. We spent some time with her college friends, “The Slores” which, to be honest was pretty awesome. Great group of girls, that sadly, consider me just one of the girls. There were lots of stories about hooking up, relationships with dudes, peoples expertise, and all the while not giving a rats ass a “dude” was in their presence. But it was fun getting some insight into the ladies viewpoint… all the while getting drunk and heading out to watch the Oregon Ducks take on the Cal Bears. (Which, btw, Cal Memorial Stadium… worst. stadium. ever.)

While those were some amazing highlights, the greatest highlight came right around December, when I was offered a new job with an AMAZING company. So long to The Gym, hello National Non-Profit Company that helps battle some pretty ugly diseases. So I’m pretty stoked about that.

Seeing as how this is my blog, and I generally like to brag about how awesome I am, WordPress was kind enough boast my ego just a bit more by sending me my blog stats from the previous year. Which, just reinforced my already known assumptions… I’m awesome. And so is this blog.

Enjoy my awesomeness…

The stats helper monkeys at WordPress.com mulled over how this blog did in 2010, and here’s a high level summary of its overall blog health:

Healthy blog!

The Blog-Health-o-Meter™ reads Wow.

Crunchy numbers

Featured image

A Boeing 747-400 passenger jet can hold 416 passengers. This blog was viewed about 12,000 times in 2010. That’s about 29 full 747s.

In 2010, there were 7 new posts, growing the total archive of this blog to 93 posts. There were 29 pictures uploaded, taking up a total of 8mb. That’s about 2 pictures per month.

The busiest day of the year was January 7th with 299 views. The most popular post that day was Irish Wake Style… Pt.2.

Where did they come from?

The top referring sites in 2010 were facebook.com, twitter.com, sittingpugs.wordpress.com, search.aol.com, and teachermegpie.blogspot.com.

Some visitors came searching, mostly for rachel bilson, blake lively, arizona state girls, byu girls, and chelsea noble.

Attractions in 2010

These are the posts and pages that got the most views in 2010.

1

Irish Wake Style… Pt.2 September 2009
5 comments

2

How I Lose 10 Bucks Every March… March 2009
3 comments

3

V Day with Rachel Bilson… February 2009
3 comments

4

Mayonnaise Colored Benz, I Push Miracle Whips…. June 2008
2 comments

5

“A Very Special Blog Post…” April 2009
5 comments

Also, it’s good to know that in a world where searches are dominated by crazy hookers, whores, Blake Lively, College Girls, and Rachel Bilson… It’s good to know that a majority of people came here because I referenced Chelsea Noble…

One Hot Babysitter

Show Me That Smile Again….

Email Me…
SarcasmAsAWepaon@gmail.com

Until Next Time…

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What I’m Thankful For…

27 11 2008

I recently looked and realized for a minute there I was posting every other day. Then came some time spent in the bakery of The Warehouse and I noticed that my posting, like my dignity, was fading away. So here I am. With a more of a promise to try and post a little more often.

A friend of mine who writes a blog had a pretty sweet post of the things she is thankful for. She used Flickr and it was pretty awesome. I was impressed. My list however is unique, and I don’t think I can find some of the images. (You’ll see soon enough.) So, with that being said, here goes my list.

(in no particular order.)

I’m Thankful for….
Turkey
Playing Thanksgiving Day football.
Not being hurt in said Thanksgiving Day football.
My Family.
My Parents.
My Brother being home from college.
A roof over my head.
My wonderful, awesome, friends.
The Civil War. (Oregon v Oregon State. Not North v South. Although it did help bring an end to slavery and such… so I’m pretty thankful for that too.)
A job.
My Car.
Movies.
I live in a country where people can buy thousands of pies in one day.
I live in a country where people can make thousands of pies in one day.
I live in a country where we celebrate holidays in which, gorging out on food, playing/watching football, not giving people gifts, and getting the day off.
I live in a country where I’m allowed to vote.
I’m live in a country where I’m able to question my government.
The Red Sox.
Manchester United.
Girls who wear “party pants/soroity pants” to The Warehouse to do some Thanksgiving shopping.
Those same girls who have a little bit of Vicky’s Secret showing. Makes an eight hour day just a bit more bearable.
Girls who wear boyshorts.
Beer Pong.
Jack Daniels.
Having Crushes.
Las Vegas.
Combination of Beer Pong IN Las Vegas.
My Bed.
My Grandparents. Both sets.
Paragon.
The invention of the thong.
Nike.
Video Games.
The Internet.
My little Hula Girl dashboard top that moves while I type.
Ikea.
Holiday Sales.
Music.
My Health.
The new trend in womens fashion, to wear long wool coats, skirts, and FM Boots.
FM Boots.
College Football Saturdays.
Being a Coach.

Good times with friends, with many more to come.

Happy Thanksgiving 08′ Everyone.





A Sports Rant, and The Hills

28 04 2008

I’ve been watching a lot of sports lately. Mostly a lot of soccer. I happen to love soccer. I’m a huge fan of Manchester United. There are a lot of people in the world that would call me a bandwagon fan, and while I can’t entirely deny that, I have a legitimate reason.

Back in the day before the widespread satellite phenomenon even extended cable didn’t offer that much soccer on TV. I’d been rasied playing soccer and it’s one of those things that, while I may not be the best at, I can definitely hold my own. So when European soccer was on TV most the time it was Liverpool or Manchester United. So I grew up watching Man U. And have to say, I totally fell in love with the club and it’s players. Namely one Eric Cantona. A French asshole (yeah that was a fan.) with a penchant for socring goals… along with coaches wives, which is how he ended up at Man U. Anyway, the point of this is, Man U’s season is coming to an end with a run at not only the English title, but the European title… I’m excited.

Strangely I’ve also been watching a lot of NBA basketball. Which really has surprised me. I’m not a fan of the NBA. I grew up being a fan of Michael Jordan and him leaving the NBA left something to be desired in watching a random game. Jordan is no longer around, and neither are my Chicago Bulls, so I’ve been rooting for Cleveland (with the second coming of Michael Jordan, in Lebron James) and of course the Boston Celtics.

Here begins my sports rant….
#1. Arena musical selections should really be carefully monitored. Whilst watching a Cleveland game, during one of their timeouts, I couldn’t help but over hear Sweet Caroline being played. WTF???? Sweet Caroline. The same song that is played at EVERY Boston Red Sox home game? Pull your head out Cleveland. But I mean I guess it’s to be expected, their fans aren’t very sports literate anyway. Their the same fans that thought towels were going to get them through the ALCS last year. PS… hey cleveland…. real stadiums have their own traditions. Real fans don’t need gimmicks. Of course I can’t fault you completely. You are the city that had their heart ripped out by Art Model. I apologize for that, but start building your fan IQ.

#1b Dear Salt Lake City,
Hi! We love that you are in the Playoffs this year. Seems like you guys do that a lot. Congrats to you guys. We’d like to bring a little something to your attention, and it has to do with your musical selection in the arena. We couldn’t help but notice that during a time out you were playing 2 Legit 2 Quit by MC Hammer. Really? Now we understand that 95% of your population is white and is in fact Mormon, and we also know that by those two facts alone, MC Hammer is probably one of the top sellers in the “rap” genre down there. But I have to say people, after doing a little research you would have though you guys could have just followed a strict musical selection of Jock Jams. Just put the CD in and press play during time outs. There are 5 discs so I’m pretty sure that should last you the playoffs.

It should also be noted in the the almost 10 years of Jock Jams, not once is 2 Legit 2 Quit on one of those albums. Something Salt Lake should probably be notified of.

#2.
Speaking of fan IQ… what the hell is Washington Wizards fans’ deal??? They have got to be some of the worst fans in the ENTIRE world. Slinging around a towel cause it was free, I can forgive that. Wearing all white to the arena cause it looks cool on TV, I can forgive that. What I cannot, and WILL not forgive is the intolerable chants of OV-ER-RAT-ED when LEBRON JAMES is shooting free throws. Seriously, who in their right fucking mind thinks Lebron James is overrated? Oh that’s right Washington Wizards Gaurd DeShawn Stevenson said this in an interview…

When he was leaving the building, Mike Lee was chatting him up and mentioned LeBron again. DeShawn has obviously heard enough of that.

“He’s overrated,” DeShawn told Mike. “And you can say I said that.”

You’ve got some balls Stevenson. Some huge balls…. but in reality, that’s about all you’ve got. I mean lets take a comparison…
LEBRON JAMES 4 Years Pro
points per game 27.3
rebounds per game 6.9
assists per game 6.6

DeShawn Stevenson 7 years pro
points per game 8.7
rebounds per game 2.4
assists per game 1.9

YOWZERS! I didn’t realize they gave NBA Contracts for Sucking. (I’m not claiming I can play any better, but I’m not calling out a future Hall of Famer. That of course is no knock to you DeShawn.)

oh by the way…. DeShawn…. I’m not sure if you know this, but Lebron has 34, 22, 30, and 32 points in the 4 games of the playoffs. I wouldn’t be looking for that defensive player of the year award anytime soon.

Anyway… on to some other things…. Like the Hills.

I’m really beginning to hate this show. I’m not going to lie. I wish they would move the point of focus off of Lauren, for in fact her life, is not only boring, but repetitive.

Like I know this show is targeted at younger females, but is this really what they like? A stupid girl who a.) won’t let go of a grudge b.) reverts to the same mistakes over and over c.) is completely spoiled outta her mind and doesn’t have to do a thing in life?

A. Lauren if you’ve got a sex tape…. let the world see it. And by the world I mean me. I can do a little photoshop editing and take good ole J-Wahls face outta there and insert anyone you’d like. (namely me.) If your supposed best friend is the one who released the tape, don’t be pissed at her…. stop making porn at her house. It’s just a common courtesy. I mean, my friends all know if they have sex at my house, not only will my mom be pissed, but I’ll be filming the shit to make the next set of car payments. This would also work out a lot better if any of my friends were famous.

B. Lauren, move on with your life. For reals. find some new blood in that pathetic little circle of friends you have. There are millions of people in LA. More than likely there are lots of dudes who would be willing to take a shot with you. Shit, my friend Mr. Royal lives in LA. I could set you guys up. He’s a cool dude. Please for the love of god stop recycling the dudes in your life. I don’t want to see Brody, (ps his girl is all sorts of smokin hot… and don’t think the world didn’t notice you look her up and down and judge. And yes… she’s prettier than you.) I don’t want to see Jason, and I sure as fuck don’t want to see Stephen. If I wanted to see Stephen again, I’d pop in my dvd’s of Laguna Beach. Of course then i’d be forced to watch Kristen Cavallari…. meow.

C.) I hate how spoiled you are LC. At some point I wish you would fall in love with some transient on the street, get married and have mommy and daddy disown you so you could enter the real world. I only say this because I am jealous of your house. It is very nice. Wonder what the monthly payments on that bitch are…

With all this said and done, it’s nice to see Justin Bobby looking normal. I’m not going to lie, I’m pretty sure the ladies love this “cat” looking clean cut. And now that he’s not looking/talking like a transient on a 4 day binger, I’m not sure I’ve got anything to make fun of him for.

Killer Boots Man!

For those of you missing some good ole fashion reality shows, here are some other shows you may want to catch….

Hells Kitchen
Deadliest Catch
The Alaska Experiment
American Idol (I know I know.)

enjoy your week…