Noooooooooo!!!!!…

18 02 2009

DAMN YOU PEREZ HILTON!!!

DAMN YOU! You effectively ruined my day! 

rachel_bilson1

Maybe she’s not a beard after all??? Congrats to actress/fashionista Rachel Bilson and her actor beau, Hayden Christensen.

The duo got engaged in December and the news is just leaking now! A friend babbled, “They’re so excited! They’re a great couple.

Rachel seems thrilled beyond belief.” A wedding date has yet to be set. We can’t wait to see what Miz Bilson chooses to wear!


I’m at a loss of words. (Thats not true, I just figure people say that for dramatic effect) Are you serious?!? Surely you can’t be serious Ms. Bilson. I mean…. WTF?

DId you SEE Jumper? I did! It was on VALENTINES DAY! I guess you’ve already forgotten the time we spent together haven’t you Rach?? It just hurts.

Hadyen Christensen? For reals?

Did you not see what he did to Padme? Yeah he killed her! Now, granted this may have happened in a Galaxy Far, Far Away, and it may not be 100% real, but for fuck sake!

He took out Natalie Portman (huge sin among geeks), dismantled the Jedi Order (even bigger sin among geeks), and became Darth Vader (Somewhat cool for geeks. Not so much Hayden becomeing Darth Vader, but Darth Vader in general). I’m not sure if you’ve noticed, but I’m pretty sure it’s going to be really hard to make out with that mask on Rach!

Someone help her out. More than likely Hayden has picked up a little knowledge of the Force and is now brain washing her! Quick, I need a Jedi, and I need one NOW! Get over to Ms. Bilson’s house and start some Jedi mind shit to make her see the light.

Plus, do some IMDBing Rachel. Did you know he was in Life as A House? What a pussy.

Lord I’m pissed.

Hadyen Christensen again ruining my life. First it was the Star Wars movies, now it’s taking Rachel Bilson.

A pox on you Hayden Christensen! A POX!

More on my love of Rachel Bilson Here…

Untill Next time…

SarcasmAsAWeapon@gmail.com

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8 responses

18 02 2009
Summer

I can’t believed I stopped what I was doing to read this. You’ve done better. Step it up.

18 02 2009
JDub

I think technically the time you spent together during Jumper can also be considered time she spent falling in love with her fiance since they were in the movie TOGETHER…aka WITHOUT you.

Sorry but I think some tough love is needed on this one buddy.

And your Star Wars references are way over my head. GEEK.

18 02 2009
DoubleDown

That cut like a knife JDub. A knife.

Notice I didn’t say lightsaber cause then that would have gone way over your head.

18 02 2009
JDub

I’m sorry, but the truth can be a tough lady to deal with.

And as for lightsabers I just have a lot of questions regarding where does the energy come from, how do they get re-charged, do they run out of power, where do you get them from…etc.

I’m curious like a cat, that’s why my friends call me whiskers.

19 02 2009
DoubleDown

please go here for all your lightsaber related questions.

And to be honest, if you were that curious, I’d imagine you’d look up the answers yourself.

You do know how to work the Google machine right?

18 02 2009
sittingpugs

But will it last? Will they procreate on purpose? What would the descendants look like….

25 02 2009
Miss E

What is a Pox?

25 02 2009
DoubleDown

A Pox, is a form of disease.

A Pox on you, is a term used by witches of the Robin Hood time period.

Small-pox
Chicken-pox

are all poxes. Glad we all learned something here today.

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