My Love Affair With Rock of Love

6 03 2008

As some of you know, I love Rock of Love. I’ve been loving Rock of Love season 2 immensely. Last weeks episode of the USO show for the Veterans. That was awesome.

Raise your hand if you thought one of those old guys was going to faint during the Inna and Destiny strip show???

*raises hand*

Seriously though, what a way to go. Sitting peacefully in your chair, all adorned with honorable medals, when a Ukrainian man stripper, and her midget look a like sidekick walk out on stage, and BAM you didn’t realize it, but it’s actually a live version of the Crying Game. With huge Ukrainian…… “parts.”

That’s all besides the point. Turns out my friend and yours Daisy is Oscar De La Hoya’s niece/sister/love child/favorite stripper.Daisy De La Hoya - Rock of Love Season 2

This explains EVERYTHING!I mean I was wondering why the hell she talked so funny and so slow. For a minute, I actually thought they were making reality shows be Equal Opportunity Employers compliant. I mean, her thought process and her speech patterns raised a lot of questions. She couldn’t be that drunk ALL the time. Could she? And with this small revelation it all became just a little more clear.

Oscar, used Daisy as a sparring parter! It’s the only explanation. I mean it’s probably not the first or last time that Daisy is going to see a one-two combination to the head! And I wouldn’t doubt it at all if the Golden Boy himself helped her trained to go at least 5 rounds? Come to think of it he probably got his lighting quick reflexes by countless hours of speed bag training.

Oh who am I kidding.

Everyone knows the Golden Boy is gay.

Take a look at this email exchange.

To: VH1RockofLoveProducersFrom:
OscarDeLaHoya.com

Dear Producers,

I had heard that a second Season of Rock of Love was to be cast. I am a very famous person wondering if Mr. Michaels would indeed be open to some new possibilities? I’m brunette 5’10 and 154 pounds. Have lots of stamina, energy, and have been told I’m a real knockout.I have enclosed a picture.Oscar De La Hoya Fishnet

Hope to hear from you soon!
The Golden Boy 😉

To: OscarDeLaHoya.com
From:VH1RockofLoveProducers

Golden Boy,

Ummm. Thanks. I’m not sure how to say this delicately. While you definitely fit the what Mr. Michaels is looking for in the looks category, we think you have one too many features that may turn Mr. Michaels off. You must remember this isn’t the 80’s anymore and he’s no longer on a 3 day coke binge. (Although based on some decisions, you wouldn’t know that.) Anyway, thanks for your inquiry.

You wouldn’t by chance happen to have a stripper hot niece would you?

Thank You.
The Producers at Vh1’s Rock of Love.

Ps, after seeing the above pictures of Diasy, (which you can see more at TheSuperficial.com)I’m totally changing my vote to her winning. I mean, maybe it’s just me but her holding that bottle of Jack and lines of coke between her legs…. Who would pick anyone else. Now excuse me whilst continue my love affair with Jack Daniel’s, Coke, and Whorish Strippers.

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3 responses

10 03 2008
JDub

What’s with the bullet casings? I mean I get the coke and the booze and the slutty outfit (standard accessories of whorish women) but really…the bullets…I would think you as a representative and brand fan of JD would think this sends the wrong message about their product…just sayin.

3 09 2008
Sanja

i love rock of love and all of the drama that goes along with it!!! haha

14 10 2008
No Good Title… « I Use Sarcasm As A Weapon….

[…] fact, I think I may have referred to her as half retarded in one of my previous blogs. By the way after watching Tropic Thunder I’ve found that I can make fun of people who are […]

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