Hatred….

26 09 2008

For people close to me, they’ve gotten the impression that I pretty much hate my life right now.

The fact of the matter is… I really do.

THe job hunt is still on, the high school soccer team I coach is underperforming, College football as of this week is all out of whack, and my unemployment ran out this week.

So I’m pretty much shooting 0-4 in the grand scheme of life. But today is the like the perfect storm of hatred for me. I’m still pissed that the OSU Beavers beat USC last night. I’m still pissed that my HS team played like crap last night, and I”m even more pissed that I have to go to an interview for a job I don’t really want.

The job was with a big corporate Gym and I was applying for Membership Counselor. My fisrt interview was yesterday and apparently the nice cute young lady liked me enough to recommend me to her boss.

My interview was at 10:30 am. Which I am totally fine with. I get all dolled up and roll into the place knowing that this is a job I can do, but for the most part, have no desire to do commission based sales. So me and the GM are talking interviewing and I think things are going pretty well. He tells me about leads and such and that you have to generate 15 a day. Here is where things start going down hill.

You see, I hate people. That’s not a statement to be funny. I hate people. I’m not the type of person that we meet and instantaneously were best friends. It just doesn’t happen. I totally judge people. Its a flaw I suppose. I’m not outgoing. I’ve got great friends, and family in this world, I don’t need new ones. You may think were friends, but deep down I have a huge resentment for you and don’t even like you.

So the GM and I are talking and toward the end of the interview, he says to me…

GM: “So what I’m going to have you do is grab a clip board, and go out on the floor and see if you can generate 5 new leads from the people working out.”
Me: “Sounds great!”

At that second it was pretty much over. Done. I don’t want this job. For the most part it goes back to the I Hate People factor. It also stems from a respect factor at a gym. These people are here working out. They have a plan. They’re there at 10:30 am on a mutherfucking Thursday for a reason. And you want me to interrupt their workout to generate leads. No. Way.

This is also the reason, I’ll never pick up on a girl at the gym. If a girl really wanted to get picked up she’d get sauced and roll to the nearest Fraternity party. Otherwise, more than likely she’s there to workout.

So I get one guy to say that his entire office may be looking for some memberships. I’m like sweet. I’ve talked to 90% of the people at the gym and I figure getting an office full of people could be pretty decent. I walk back over to the GM and we basically finish up the interview. As we’re about to wrap up, I notice he keeps asking me about the lead I generated. The office size, what the guy did, etc etc….

He then takes some notes, and KEEPS IT FOR HIMSELF. I was so pissed at this point.

More then likely if the office size is 15 people, and 5 of those people sign up… that GM just raked in a pretty sweet commission based on the lead I generated for him in an interview. That my friends pissed me off.

Anyway… so most of you know I’m a huge fan of College football. Well the College football world was turned upside down again by the Mighty Beavers of OSU upsetting my number one pick USC. With that being said, the next part of this blog shall now be titled…

That’s What She Said…. Enjoy.

The Beavers, and their fans, expected to be penetrated by the Trojans. (1) However this was not the case, as the Beavers mustered enough strength to thwart many attempts of a Trojan entering their backfield. (2) The Beavers decided to go against being spread wide across the field, (3) instead the Beavers opted for a tight inside game.(4) And on this night, the Beavers had enough protection,(5)as Jaquizz couldn’t be contained by any Trojan.(6) They withstood a number of attempts as the Trojans went up-and-down the Beavers turf.(7) After a sloppy Trojan performance, (8) the Beavers discarded them,(9) washed up (10), and looked forward to going down (11) to Utah for some fun.

Hope you enjoyed that.

Here is the rest of my predictions for a weekend of college football.

As we all know they already lost. Which as we all know is bad news for my Ducks. No one likes losing, esp twice in a row. And if the Ducks don’t pick a QB, we’re in for a world of hurt when the Trojans go looking for redemption.


Well, after Georgia made Arizona State it’s dog toy last weekend, I’m thinking they’re taking this momentum thingy and taking it to Alabama. Plus they showed lots of footage of UGA VII. Which is cool, but not nearly as cool as UGA V…


Gators play Ole Miss. Win. Plus, I’m still really high on Athletes that were on MTV. Can’t lose!


They’ve got a bye week this week which is good. Other Heisman candidates will have the opportunity to shine.

(ps, in college we named one of our intramural teams Bye Week. It was awesome. About the third week into games, the director figured out what was going on, and we were 3-0.)


Well BYU has Utah State… and basically that’s a padding of the stats game for Max Hall. Dark Horse for the Heisman. His only knock will come at the end of the season when everyone says…. “Well, who did he play??” Which will be unfair, cause that kid is going to deserve a Heisman.

Well that’s about all the time we have today kids.

As always feel free to email me at
SarcasmAsAWeapon@gmail.com

Go Ducks.

Oh, and Miss E, hope you didn’t take offense to the That’s What She Said Game.

And another sidebar, if you’re a Duck fan, and your new facebook headline says… “i’m a Beaver Believer for one day” or “I’m becoming a Beaver after last night.”
A.) If you graduated your diploma should be taken away.
B.) If you haven’t graduated stay in school cause you’re still stupid.

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3 responses

27 09 2008
ACD

wait, so does this mean i’m not getting a membership from you?

as i watched the game last night in complete and utter awe, I was reminded of a time not long ago when the mighty beavs took down USC. seeing it again? priceless.

29 09 2008
Daniel

damn you osu damn you. i feel sorry for the ducks this week. as i write this usc is probably still getting their ass chewed from that game. as for the job search… go find a job in law enforcement. i think you could pull off the handlebar mustache.

29 09 2008
sittingpugs

You see, I hate people. That’s not a statement to be funny. I hate people. I’m not the type of person that we meet and instantaneously were best friends. It just doesn’t happen. I totally judge people. Its a flaw I suppose. I’m not outgoing. I’ve got great friends, and family in this world, I don’t need new ones. You may think were friends, but deep down I have a huge resentment for you and don’t even like you.

Despising the human species is normal. Being averse to the pretense of gregariousness is not that uncommon either. While you might call it a case of semantics, placing moral judgments on people one doesn’t know well may be uncharitable at times, but it’s absolutely normal and healthy to formulate impressions (consciously or not) of everyone we encounter.

From what a person wears, to how they gesture, how they walk, how they speak; what they eat, what they buy—if one notices these things, one will make an initial mental image. Getting to know someone (whether it’s finding out more information or spending more time and being able to observe more) can result in a confirmation or revision of that initial image.

You may believe that one actually can have too many friends, but it doesn’t hurt to have a solid set of allies and back-ups, right? Although, Valhalla forbid that you’d ever be in a jam where you’ve gone through your family, flesh-and-blood friends, and then have to resort to your practice squad.

I apologize beforehand if the following question makes you lose your dinner/midnight snack/breakfast, but is there an Ikea in your vicinity? If so, there may be stockroom/inventory options? or an IMAC store?

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